Aisle Twenty
February 2022
 
Found this beaut in a grocery cart in the
Meijer parking lot.  

Paper is thin and
almost fabric-like from being handled
often and/or tucked in pocket.  At least it
wasn’t warm when I found it. 
​Fun penmanship, possibly
​written by a male.
  
Kleenix
​Love this spelling.  I know that’s
exactly how they pronounce it.  Possibly
on the list for emotional reasons. 
Maybe they have COVID?
UGH – again glad the list wasn’t warm.
Bananas
Potassium Boost?  Or did they
get one of those specific banana hooks
for the kitchen counter? 
Is this shit just for show?
Yougart
Hey! You! Go gart yourself
OJ
That curly O is kinda cute.  But they
better not be buying that
​pulp free variety.  Pussy
Miralax
Taking back that cute thing now
Prune Juice
Crossed off.  Hopefully
because they changed their minds.  OMG. 
Imagine a Miralax/Prune Juice Cocktail?! 
RIP your asshole
You  Ham
Bone-in?  haha
Milk cream
What?  We now gotta
differentiate between like
Hand/Milk/Antifungal/Bryl? 
Nothing else on this list is that specific.
Paper plates
Party? 
Can they not wash dishes? 
Is their water shut off?  Better not be with
that nasty ass Miralax cocktail party.
Dog Food
This absolutely has to be an
emotional support animal.
Obvious last minute addition to the list:
Look for lamb shank – Appreciate the
eyeballs in the O’s.  Don’t appreciate lamb
at all though.  Gross.  And I really don’t
appreciate anyone shanking lambs. 
Wait – are they gonna make a shank
out of that ham bone? 
​Then they buy some
Kleenix because they figure they are
gonna cry about it?  WTF? 
WHAT ABOUT THE LAMB?
​
Synopsis:
Pack your shit and get
out of my town

Vowel Pellet