Aisle 20
February 2022
Found this beaut in a grocery cart in the
Meijer parking lot. Paper is thin and
almost fabric-like from being handled
often and/or tucked in pocket. At least it
wasn’t warm when I found it.
Fun penmanship, possibly
written by a male.
Kleenix – love this spelling. I know that’s
exactly how they pronounce it. Possibly
on the list for emotional reasons.
Maybe they have COVID?
UGH – again glad the list wasn’t warm.
Bananas – Potassium Boost? Or did they
get one of those specific banana hooks
for the kitchen counter?
Is this shit just for show?
Yougart – Hey! You! Go gart yourself
OJ – That curly O is kinda cute. But they
better not be buying that
pulp free variety. Pussy
Miralax – Taking back that cute thing now
Prune Juice – Crossed off. Hopefully
because they changed their minds. OMG.
Imagine a Miralax/Prune Juice Cocktail?!
RIP your asshole
You Ham – Bone-in? haha
Milk cream – What? We now gotta
differentiate between like
Hand/Milk/Antifungal/Bryl?
Nothing else on this list is that specific.
Paper plates – Party?
Can they not wash dishes?
Is their water shut off? Better not be with
that nasty ass Miralax cocktail party.
Dog Food – this absolutely has to be an
emotional support animal.
Obvious last minute addition to the list:
Look for lamb shank – Appreciate the
eyeballs in the O’s. Don’t appreciate lamb
at all though. Gross. And I really don’t
appreciate anyone shanking lambs.
Wait – are they gonna make a shank
out of that ham bone?
Then they buy some
Kleenix because they figure they are
gonna cry about it? WTF?
WHAT ABOUT THE LAMB?
Synopsis: Pack your shit and get
out of my town
by Vowel Pellet
February 2022
Found this beaut in a grocery cart in the
Meijer parking lot. Paper is thin and
almost fabric-like from being handled
often and/or tucked in pocket. At least it
wasn’t warm when I found it.
Fun penmanship, possibly
written by a male.
Kleenix – love this spelling. I know that’s
exactly how they pronounce it. Possibly
on the list for emotional reasons.
Maybe they have COVID?
UGH – again glad the list wasn’t warm.
Bananas – Potassium Boost? Or did they
get one of those specific banana hooks
for the kitchen counter?
Is this shit just for show?
Yougart – Hey! You! Go gart yourself
OJ – That curly O is kinda cute. But they
better not be buying that
pulp free variety. Pussy
Miralax – Taking back that cute thing now
Prune Juice – Crossed off. Hopefully
because they changed their minds. OMG.
Imagine a Miralax/Prune Juice Cocktail?!
RIP your asshole
You Ham – Bone-in? haha
Milk cream – What? We now gotta
differentiate between like
Hand/Milk/Antifungal/Bryl?
Nothing else on this list is that specific.
Paper plates – Party?
Can they not wash dishes?
Is their water shut off? Better not be with
that nasty ass Miralax cocktail party.
Dog Food – this absolutely has to be an
emotional support animal.
Obvious last minute addition to the list:
Look for lamb shank – Appreciate the
eyeballs in the O’s. Don’t appreciate lamb
at all though. Gross. And I really don’t
appreciate anyone shanking lambs.
Wait – are they gonna make a shank
out of that ham bone?
Then they buy some
Kleenix because they figure they are
gonna cry about it? WTF?
WHAT ABOUT THE LAMB?
Synopsis: Pack your shit and get
out of my town
by Vowel Pellet
